Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone

Sunday, November 1, 2009

A New Beginning!

Back in June, I had to put my dreams of becoming a surrogate on hold. I thought that I may never be a surrogate, and it was very hard to let go of that dream. I've wanted to be a surrogate since I first heard about it, and a year ago I poured myself into the surrogacy world. I've made some of the best friends I've ever had, I've learned so much about myself, and I'm a stronger & better person because of the friends I've made & the things I've learned. So when I had to put surrogacy on hold, it was devastating. But I never put the thought out of my mind...

About 2 months ago I decided I was ready, so I stepped back in, slowly. I sat down & made a list: qualities I wanted my Intended Parents to have, things that are important to me in a contract, which clinics I would like to work with, etc. Then I began looking for IP's who shared the same ideas & values that I did.

It took a few weeks, and few wacky e-mails from some less-than-ideal IP's, but then I got an e-mail from K. I knew in her first e-mail that I liked her, and the more we talked, the more I thought she might be a really good fit. We agreed on the number of embryos to transfer, we agreed on the selective reduction/termination issue (a big one for me) and we agreed that a surrogacy should not be rushed, and we wanted to take our time & get to know each other first. We've been e-mailing now for a little over a month, and last weekend I met K, her husband J, and their daughter for lunch. I knew then that they were the perfect IP's for me! K & J felt the same, and here we are, officially matched!

We have an appointment with an RE in the DFW area for November 19th, and we are trying to get an appointment made for psych evals. The forms for our criminal background checks have been mailed, and we're working on finding a good lawyer for our contract. We've even decided on which doctor to use for the pregnancy! Hopefully we can have a final draft of the contract ready to sign right after our appointment with the RE, so once he gives his official thumbs up we can sign. We're on the right track, and I am so, so excited. If everything goes as planned, it looks like we should be ready for a mid-late January transfer. K & J have three frozen embryos (or 'totsicles', as I like to call them!) left from their cycle that resulted in their daughter. We've decided to transfer just one embryo, since the thought of twins seems to scare them as much as it does me! Hopefully the transfer will result in a successful pregnancy, but if not, we'll do a fresh cycle.

My friend Nina has been searching for a long time for a match, and this past week she was officially matched with an IF! We were supposed to go out to dinner Friday night to celebrate, but my oldest son got a stomach virus so we had to postpone, so Tuesday we're going to have lunch to celebrate our matches. I don't know what the restaraunt is called, or what kind of food they serve, but I know that they have fried Snickers bars, and that is ALL I need to know. I'm so glad that I not only have my friends who are experienced surrogates to help me through this journey, but I will also have Nina to go through this with me as well. She's also a first time GS, and will be transferring around the same time as I do. I feel like I've hit the surrogacy lottery, haha!


  1. Ivy - It's "K" - we are soooo very excited as makes me want to giggle like a child and cry, with joy of course, at the same time. I think this journey is going to be great! I am really looking forward to all of the exciting, nerve-wracking, crazy, etc. etc. times! We will try to be the best IPs ever!

  2. Thanks for the sweet stuff you say. I'm glad to be going through this journey with you, Ivy. You've been so helpful from the very beginning with my search and my losses of IPs... my dreadful mistakes with agency stuff and here we are. Finally getting ready to make babies for some really wonderful people. I can't wait to get started with the rest of this journey and being side by side with you will be one of the best things about it. Thanks so much Ivy. You're a wonderfully sweet and thoughtful person, but don't worry... I won't tell anyone and ruin your reputation. LOL ;) I think everyone already knows though.